"Getting Back in the Game"

Yesterday was my first day back at work after the seperation of Kenny and I. It was really great to get out of the house and go see all my little ones and get my mind off of stuff. Miss Coleman and Miss Angela were so understanding and compassionate. I pretty much did no brain work all day, but nevertheless, it felt good to go and do it. The most difficult part was all the questions from other staff people that don't know me very well. I broke down in tears on more than one occassion. Somebody told me that getting a divorce is like experiencing a death. They said that you have to have time to actually grieve the loss. I think this is true. I personally am back and forth about whether this is even the right thing to do. Sometimes I think that this is a me issue, not a he or even a we issue. I have lost myself and my sense of self worth, and I long so bad to have that again. I was working towards that and thought that once I was done with school and was teaching that I could feel like a was a contributing member of the family. It was always a joke around our house, because I am such a horrible house keeper, that Kenny would love to be "Mr. Mom", and I would go earn the money. He was self assured enough to feel the value in that, and I am not.
Well, regardless, I am heading back to BSU today after being off from school the whole last week. I am very behind in all my classes, but I am determined to get caught up. My professors have been very understanding, and I am going to finish this college thing. Not only am I going to finish, I am going to finish it well.